JOFFREY: Mine. That's what the Red Keep is.
The smallfolk say its color comes from the blood Aegon spilled to win his crown.
(LAUGHS)
Fools.
Blood doesn't soak into stone, no matter how hard I try.
Aegon built his castle of red rock
to remind people of the fires he'd roasted his enemies in.
So whenever King's Landing looked up, they'd see the price of defiance.
He knew the first rule of kings.
Only fear keeps men in line.
Fear and punishment.
A lesson he taught his son, Maegor.
When the builders finally finished the Red Keep,
Maegor executed them all to keep its secrets safe.
Rumor has it, miles of hidden passageways
run behind the walls and under the floors.
One day, I'll have to find them.
Traitors and women work in shadows.
A king has no need for secrecy.
Now, people named Maegor "the Cruel."
But I doubt any dared in his day.
His strength was all too rare in the degenerate Targaryen blood.
The simpering Baelor the Blessed
created the Maidenvault to imprison his own sisters,
and save himself from carnal thoughts.
Disgusting.
Though, I admit a Princevault could be amusing,
when Tommen bores me.
My favorite place in the Red Keep?
There are so many.
The Traitor's Walk, where I mount the heads of my enemies.
It's a shame flesh rots so slowly.
I've almost run out of spikes.
The dungeons are also quite nice once you get past the first two levels,
a stable for common criminals and private cells for useful highborns.
How boring, I know.
But then, you come to the black cells.
No windows. No torches.
Just darkness, and whatever you hear in there with you.
Here we keep the greatest traitors, until the king is ready for them.
And with these,
I often like to take my time.
But I've heard rumors of an even lower, hidden level,
Maegor's favorite.
Once a man was taken here,
he never saw the sun again, nor heard a human voice,
nor breathed a breath free of agonizing pain.
Varys must know the way, but that overgrown girl pretends not to.
Maybe he fears I'll make him a victim.
Maybe I will.
Then again, torture chambers are just so private.
Better to punish your enemies where everyone can see and remember.
Like that Targaryen who forced his nephew to watch
as he fed the boy's traitor mother to a dragon.
Oh, what I could do with a dragon.
Even Aerys, fool as he was, knew to burn men alive with an audience
to spread the terror far and wide across his kingdoms.
Of course, I know my favorite place now.
When I sit on the Iron Throne,
high in the Red Keep, all of Westeros scuttles below me,
like insects waiting for my heel to land.